Nerv: Dry Cleaning and Takeout
by tehprognoob
Summary: Gendo the lowly office worker, once the heir of the illustrious Rukubungi sushi empire and now proud  though broke  husband and father, must make it in the hostile lands of America, armed with nothing but love, his family, and tuna fish.
1. God, the Plane Tickets Salesman

**Nerv: Dry Cleaning and Takeout**

In the city of Tokyo, the lowly office worker is hardly a glamorous position. He works long hours for relatively low pay, but the job is enough to provide him with a stable living. God, however, must help him is he has a wife and two teenage children approaching the dreaded college years simultaneously.

Such is the case of one Gendo Ikari, formerly Gendo Rukubungi. He, his wife Yui Ikari, and his children, Shinji and Rei Ikari, live in a small rented flat with one bedroom in a crowded neighborhood. Every day, Gendo climbs out of bed while his wife and children sleep, makes breakfast and takes an hour-long commute to work, every day of the week, every week of the month, and every month of the year. As the corporate machine never sleeps, Gendo cannot rest. Yet, even the lowliest cog may have a dream. The Rukubungi family had been a clan of professional sushi chefs of the highest quality, and the Ikaris had been just another working family. Gendo gave up on sushi when he first met the young Yui. In their senior year in high school, she had been poised to drop out because her family needs another hand to work, though she dreamed of being a research molecular biologist. Gendo had found her crying in an abandoned hallway. Being so kindhearted as he was, though he grew up surrounded by bloody fish carcasses hauled in by the ton, Gendo had comforted her, and out of his own allowance squeezed out money enough that she could finish high school and earn a full scholarship to Kyoto University. It was a vital crossroads. If Yui went on to Kyoto, she would undoubtedly excel. If not, her talent would fade. Though the scholarship paid for everything, Yui's living expenses must be provided for. She cannot possibly devote herself to studying at the feet of the great Professor Kozo Fuyutsuki at Kyoto and work a job enough to support herself. For her, Gendo made a resounding sacrifice: he proposed to her, knowing that the Rukubungi matriarch, his stern grandmother, would instantly disown him. From now on, he shall forgo his future grandeur of cooking in five-star hotels and state dinners, of being revered as one of the greatest sushi chef in all the islands of Japan, and of all the benefits included. He will stop studying the art of making the Rukubungi sushi, and devote himself to supporting Yui's studies. To show his complete break with the ancient Rukubungi tradition, he even took on Yui's family name, Ikari. Many years have passed, and though Yui's research never gained them any fame or fortune, Gendo refuses to regret, even for a second, his decision to throw everything away for her.

Tonight was the same. When he stepped into the house, only Shinji and Rei were inside, intently working on some homework. Yui was having another long day at the lab, so it falls to him to cook again. Having greeted his children, Gendo stepped into the small kitchen (A closet with a stove, to be more precise) and whipped out a few pitifully scrawny little tunas, cheap rice and frozen vegetables. A far cry from his childhood days, working with fresh-caught, beautiful blue-fin from the vast Atlantic, to be sure, but his skills have made him famous throughout the neighborhood for better sushi than any store or restaurant for miles. He'd set up his own, if he had the money to do it, but he doesn't, so that was that.

And nothing changed in their daily routine. Shinji and Rei argued over complex mathematical equations, Gendo tried not to choke from the stove's fumes, and Yui came home just in time for dinner, tired but happy from a day's work with her friend, Naoko Akagi, chatting happily about abstract theories that Gendo happily shut out as simply more proof of his wife's brilliance.

**Stage I: God, the Plane Tickets Salesman**

"Dear…" Yui whispered into Gendo's ear. "The kids are two meters away."

"They're old enough," Gendo whispered back while playfully tugging his wife's nightshirt. "It was a hard day at the office today. Can't I get some reward for supporting this family?"

To be honest, the couple has had little time to be together since Shinji finally became conscious of his surroundings and began to wonder what mommy and daddy was doing at night (Rei had read all about it in some biology textbook, and understood everything without batting an eyelid when she was six…as to be expected of Yui's daughter.). Tonight, he and Rei were fast asleep. If they were quiet, Yui thought, then…

"Really fast, okay?" she said. "Don't make a sound."

"That's what I should tell you," Gendo teased as he slid his wife out of her clothes. Indeed, the couple _was_ quiet in their passion. Being less physically drained than he was, Yui took the lead and gripped her husband, doing most of the work for him. He held her shoulders down, growling into her ear and thrusting up. As he promised, it was quick. When they were done with one another, they lay together, breathing hard.

"Dear," Yui murmured.

"Something you'd like to say, Yui?"

"You can tell?"

"I know you; there's something you'd like to tell me, isn't there?"

Yui kissed him lightly.

"Well, I…my research on S2 theory…it's…it's going to go through—"

Gendo swelled with pride.

"—but I'll have to relocate to America. I need the laboratory there…"

For a minute, Gendo was silent. He is on the verge of a promotion, which would move them out of the squashed apartment and into some better living quarters.

"They will only pay my own expenses…dear; I don't want you to have to start over again for me."

"We're a family," was all he said, before he went to sleep.

The next day was a day like any other. Shinji and Rei squabbled like any other siblings, Yui left at the crack of dawn, and Gendo made breakfast before going to work…

But God! What can he do? He certainly will not tolerate being separated from his wife, but at the same time, what can he do to keep his family alive? She had told him that after two months, if her contributions proved useful, she would start getting a better salary and housing for her family. Gendo had no doubt that she will succeed. His Yui always did. He'll manage alone with some lowly job, but the kids…the kids have always chafed for the outside world. Going to America would be perfect for them. Both of them spoke good English thanks to the rigorous standards of their school, and math and sciences—the better-developed nations of Asia laugh at America's standards of education in these fields. No problems there. All he needs is to find something in America that will feed and shelter the Ikari household for two long, long months. For him, a man with nothing but a high school diploma and a love for sushi, this was easier said than done.

"Lord, I'm the only thing missing from the equation," he rasped. Too much time spent around a scientist wife and brainy children has more influence than one may expect. "I'm the problem. I've never prayed, I've never gone to Church, yes, I did steal my brother's candy when I was nine, but if you exist…if you're real, help me make a decision."

His phone rang.

"_Hello! This is Japan Airlines calling with an exclusive offer for overseas family travel! Call now to save twenty percent today by booking Japan Airlines for up to four seats!"_

God…exists

**End Stage I**


	2. Day of Memes

**Nerv: Dry Cleaning and Takeout**

**Stage II: Day of Memes**

The American Embassy was noisy, overcrowded, and even a little dirty. Rei stood aside reading quietly, while Shinji fidgeted. Yui hung onto Gendo's arm, looking quite guilty. The children had to miss a school festival that they've been looking forward to, and would henceforth never be able to see their friends again, not for a long time, anyway. Yui felt a deepening sense of responsibility, and tried to compensate by heaping them with candies and treats they'd otherwise never be allowed near. They responded with sullen looks, as it they considered the treatment too childish for them. Teenagers, she thought. They're wired to be disagreeable. She'll be so glad when they finally grow up. In the counter, Gendo was haranguing with the American at the desk with a pile of shoddily filed paperwork. He should have someone else to do it, she thought. He's hopelessly disorganized. Of course, there was no hope of being able to afford a secretary, not that their paperwork warranted much of a need for one.

At the counter, Gendo and the American behind it stared at each other, neither man willing to move a muscle until his opponent gave up.

"You know my paperwork is in perfect order," Gendo said. "What's the delay about?"

"Mr. Ikari, your wife's papers are all in order, your children's papers are all in order, but yours are not," the man hissed. "Shall we continue this fight or will you capitulate and make it easier for everyone?"

Gendo leaned forwards, crossing his fingers and peering over his glasses. The man flinched, intimidated by Gendo's straight face and cold, black eyes.

"Well played, sir, but I am not, in fact, missing any documents."

"Well, then, where is your photo, which you should have taken before coming here?" the man said, sweating a little.

"The photo is right here," Gendo said, sliding his hand into the pile of loose papers and withdrawing a tiny manila envelope. "Did you think I would forget so important a detail? How sad your family would be if you caused me any more…inconvenience." He fixed the American with his usual intimidating eyes, half his face mysteriously hidden behind his hands.

Sweat was pouring down the worker's forehead as he frantically put Gendo's paper in order. Gendo smiled to himself and cast another look at the man's open wallet, which contained a photo of a tall woman and a gorgeous teenage girl. It was so simple. All he had to do was look around and there was already a weak spot to poke. He felt a little sympathy, and saved his next volley of threats. The man hastily scribbled some stuff down, and handed Gendo a purple receipt.

"Please return in five days to claim your passport," he said. "Good day."

"Thank you, sir," Gendo said. "And please, give my regards to your beautiful wife and daughter." The man gulped, unable to think how this stranger knew, but Gendo had gathered up his papers, and he was already on his way by the time the man recovered his wits enough to serve the next person in line.

"Gendo, dear, what did you do?" Yui whispered. "The poor man looked like he was going to faint!"

Gendo fixed his glasses and looked right into Shinji's eyes.

"Son, were you watching?"

"Uh, yea," Shinji replied uncertainly.

"Deduce: what did I do, what was the purpose of what I did, what were the results? Quick!"

"Um, you observed his cubicle for signs of vulnerability, found through interpretation of visual cues what the target cares most about, and used that to pressure the target to work with greater enthusiasm," the boy said rapidly.

"Good boy!" Gendo cried. "And it worked beautifully! I _was_ missing several papers—albeit minor documents, but in his haste he has completely overlooked them! Instead, he gave us our passports without question, all because I saw his family photo on the desk!"

He slapped Shinji on the back.

"Learn well, Shinji. You'll need it in the future."

Rei and Yui looked disapprovingly at the men.

"Mother, I find father's tactics highly questionable in terms of ethics," Rei said. Yui hurried the gloating man away before anyone noticed.

"Of course, dear, but your father is just looking out for us. Remember, ethics is directional, Rei. From our point of view, it is beneficial, but from the man's point of view, it is terrifying—"

"No, mother, I will not write a research paper on the topic of ethics," Rei countered, before her mother could suggest it.

"No, of course not, dear," Yui said. The men had gone ahead of them by this time, with Gendo somehow relapsing into a grandiose scheme for world domination that he always seemed to recount over and over again, involving mentally incapacitated children, giant machines, and some sort of god-cloning. Yui shook her head, thinking that if only he stopped trying to be an evil dictator, he could probably get a better salary.

"You know, dear," she said with acid in her voice. "We have a mad janitor, Anno-san, at our lab who's always spouting the same pseudo-religious, pseudo-scientific, misinterpreted Freudian ideas that you are so obsessed with. You guys should be friends…whenever he's out of the madhouse, that is."

Shinji winced at his mother's hard remark, and retreated behind Rei to escape Yui's glare. Gendo guffawed and pulled his wife into his arms.

"So you want me to be murdered by some ex-psychopath, huh? Then you can get at a younger and better-looking man than me. Yui, you are cruel!"

Yui pushed him away with a frown on her face.

"Act your age. You're setting a bad example for Shinji."

"What about Rei?"

"She exceeds your level of maturity by well over nine thousand points."

Rei interjected with a cough.

"By Professor Akagi's scale of psychological development in the _Homo sapiens_ species, the difference is actually eight thousand and eight points, with an error margin of approximately 0.000000009%. However, that is taken with the object of comparison at a level of zero. If we disregard this assumption, then the difference will be, as you say, over nine thousand."

Gendo whirled around, flapping his jacket like a cape. It failed miserably, the cheap material plopping back to his back.

"That crazy cat lady has no right to evaluate anyone else's psychology!" he boomed. "Not with the way she screamed when her cat fell out of its hidey-hole in the ceiling! She treats the damn critters like her children."

"Father, you threw a book at Ceiling Cat," Rei pointed out. "It flipped the ceiling panel he was seated on."

"Ceiling—what?"

"Ceiling Cat," Rei said, "is the nickname of a six year old male _Felis catus domestica_, of light brown, streaked fur, named for his tendency to look through lifted ceiling panels at the laboratory. Professor Akagi is especially fond of him, as she created him from scrap DNA, and was naturally worried when you knocked him down."

"Still a damn cat," Gendo said.

Yui sighed, planting her face into the heel of her hand. Gendo and Rei argued daily, with Rei presenting cold, hard logic and Gendo decrying her arguments grandiosely with loud words and sweeping gestures. Shinji quickly became bored and followed Yui into a store to make some random purchases.

Gendo needlessly slammed both of the shop's door open with a sweep of his arms. Yui winced as the salespeople glared at the man who strode in wearing a shabby suit and the airs of a king. Yui sighed, gathered up her shopping bag, only to have it taken from her hand by Gendo.

"I'll carry it, Yui," he said. "You go outside with the kids."

"Aren't you forgetting something?"

"What?"

Yui dangled his wallet in his face.

"It's the third time this week that you've left your wallet when you went out," she scolded.

"Well, that's why I've got you," he said teasingly.

"Oh, shush, and don't get short-changed!" she shoved the wallet into his hand and marched out. He shrugged, paid the bills, narrowly avoided miscounting a stack of 100s as a stack of fifties, and walked out to meet up with his wife and children.

**End Stage II**


	3. Of Fish and Childhood Dreams

**Nerv: Dry Cleaning and Takeout**

**NOTE:** All places more specific than the city name is a product of the author's imagination, and are not affiliated with any existing real world places/agencies. References to real-life positions and events are also of a fictitious nature.

**Stage III: Of Fish and Childhood Dreams**

"_You'll never be anyone!"_

"_You'll die in poverty, no good to anybody!"_

"_We're ashamed of you, Gendo."_

"_How could you do this to your family?"_

"_Woof, woof"_

Gendo started, his seat belt digging into his stomach. He was on a spacious Boeing 747, with Yui sleeping on his arm and an engine right outside his window, blocking both the view and making the devil's own noise, even through the metal wall of the plane. He undid his seatbelt and wrapped his arm around Yui. He would not regret her, he vowed. No matter how much the dream haunted him, he would never renounce what he did. On the day he walked out, they had called him on his cell phone, decrying his very existence. Even the dog was loud enough to hear through the handset at home. The phone's plan had been summarily terminated after his grandmother delivered her two cents.

Gendo lowered the tray, disengaged from his wife, and laid his hands across each other over the table. He lowered his face behind his hands and, ignoring the smell of farts etched into the seats in front, smiled. He always found it easier to smile in his "pose." He would fly…he would fly over the rainbow, to a place far, far away, to the magical candy kingdom where all his dreams could come true. Toffees and marsh-mellows danced before his eyes, daring him to bite—

A loud fart from a…sumptuous gentleman ahead ruined Gendo's enjoyment of his imaginary marsh-mellow, and also brought to mind that there was no magical candy kingdom. He was flying to the United States of America, a land of freedom, opportunity, and ridiculously crappy healthcare. He plunged his face into his hands dejectedly. Will he never be rid of his troubles? He only had to run away, after all, but he was running out of places to run to.

"_Note to self: find better way to run away from problems in life."_

He opened a letter he had received from the Detroit 2nd District Board of Small Business Management. It was a permit to open a dry cleaning and takeout store in a neighborhood of average means and quality. With it, he could begin making sushi again. He leaned back blissfully and glanced at Yui's still beautiful face, fairly fawning over her. A discreet cough from Rei told him that he was being overtly affectionate, and that he should be considerate of the other passengers aboard. That girl acted so very matronly, making sure that he toed the line. Without much more thought, he folded up the letter and went to sleep.

**Meanwhile:**

Detroit, 2nd District Board of Small Business Management

The small 2nd District's Board was quite diverse for the small size of its charge. That is, it benefitted the small new-world yakuza group known as the Seele Group, and their affiliated fast-food chain, Angels Fast Food. Kiel Lorenz, the chairman, sat comfortably smoking a cigar while the rest of the group assembled into the meeting room. There was really nothing to talk of today. A few small restaurants folded and sold to Angels at a minimal price, their names kept original for the sake of keeping up an air of competition. For Kiel, the world was perfect. There was a new man coming in, too, one Gendo Ikari. Through his restaurant world connections, Kiel had heard of this man. He was from a family of prestigious chefs but fell from grace over a woman. Kiel smirked. Jailbait and troublesome women these days have expanded their operational parameters. By now, the group was fully assembled.

"This council shall now commence its meeting," he boomed. His Board was administrated with its own peculiar mannerisms, unique to itself. It made him feel like someone ruling the world from the shadows, perhaps as a hidden UN special council playing nations like puppets. As he had expected, the meeting was a boring repeat of the hundreds of others he had attended. At its conclusion, he could not but mourn lost time.

As he exited the office building, he ran into a young man bouncing a football in his hands.

"Kaworu," Kiel said. "What's the matter?"

"None at all, father," the silver-haired boy replied, red albino eyes doing a brief search of his father's face. "I understand that we will be having new neighbors soon?"

"Yes," Kiel said.

"Fresh meat for the game, are they not?" Kaworu asked pointedly.

"For the game…" Kiel smirked. "Indeed, son. They will soon know what it is like to lose the game at the hands of Councilman Kiel Lorenz."

Kaworu nodded without further comment. Father and son went their separate ways, Kiel to oversee the renovation of another restaurant and Kaworu off to some back alleys, where he spent his spare time hanging out with the rough and uncouth of the city's youth to satisfy his curiosity.

A flash of yellow alerted him to the presence of a tall, curvaceous girl walking down the street in a modest summer dress the color of a ripened pear. Her waist-length red-gold hair billowed out behind her.

"Good morning, Ms. Soryu," Kaworu called. She glanced at him contemptuously.

"What, off to hang with your _homies_ again?" she said mockingly. Accepting the sarcasm with grace, Kaworu bowed, a little comically.

"Do you still not accept my side-dish hobby, Asuka?" he asked with similar mocking pleasantness.

"Are you stupid?" she demanded. "You're hanging out with a bunch of…potheads!"

"_Crack_-heads, not potheads," he corrected. "They abstain from marijuana; apparently cocaine is a more acceptable drug."

"Is that supposed to make it better?"

"Is there a problem, Asuka?"

With an upturned nose, she marched down the street, deeming him utterly incurable and almost as bad as his friends. Bemusedly, he sauntered the other way. The daughter of a police officer dead in the line of duty, she had a natural tendency to despise the likes of him, but it seems that her relationship with former Lt. Kyoko Zeppelin was highly strained, which by extension meant that she had an inclination to flaunt the law. If it was any other case, Kaworu thought, he would be in jail already. That would not be good; his hands were not good at holding on tightly to a bar of soap.

**XXXXX**

Of all the denizens of Detroit, the pigeon was by far the wisest and most all-knowing, more so than the scampering, land-bound squirrel, the slinking rat, the garden snake, the myriads of insect life and the occasional stray cat. Humans were not even in the competition to begin with. And it was one such winged Socrates that first laid eyes upon the Boy. The sagely fowl ruffled its flight feathers in excited agitation, for through generations of hatchlings, there has been a prophecy passed down, from father to eldest chick, of that Chosen of the two-legged monkeys who will one day rise up and begin a Golden Age for all Pigeon-kind (Although it was supposed to be a very local phenomena). It stated that one day, after many years of famine, a boy with hair the color of charred charcoal (which always implied thrown-out BBQ scraps) will appear beneath the ancestral telephone pole, reading a book tucked within a larger book, the innermost of which will be spotted with rituals of fertility and love and beautiful women, and the outermost with the arcane art of numbers and Xs and Ys learned by all hatchlings of the two-legged monkeys. He will come and defeat the Evil One, who is covering all his leftovers and carting them off in large trucks to some unknown place beyond the reach of the city's scavenging folks. It was in this excitement that the old bird flapped to the Boy, crying for the great Chosen to stop, to take notice of His humble Servant. A car, apparently, did not think it appropriate, and the old pigeon was sent down to the dirt from whence he came, having at last laid eyes on the Savior.

**End Stage III**

A.N.: W…what the fuck did I just write…?


	4. The Effect

A/N: Before you get mad, it's all jokes.

And this was a bit darker than I'd intended. Sad humor, anyone?

'Fraid something made me have to re-upload.

**Nerv: Dry Cleaning and Takeout**

**Stage IV: The Effect of Angry Girls upon Males Guilty of Offenses of a Certain Nature**

In most scenarios where a vulnerable heroine is in dire need of rescue, the villains block all exits, and there is no way for her to fight back. A tower suffices this purpose very well, but in Detroit, there aren't too many stone-walled, buttressed castles to be found. Thus, the villains of the day must make do with whatever the ailing economy can afford to spare them. In this case, the location is a dark, dank alleyway many blocks from regions of relative safety, in the underbelly of the city where crime festered like zits on a teenager's face.

They were leering, savage beings, boys who were not yet men, men who were still boys, but certainly strong in both body and numbers. Their clothes reeked of alcohol and human stenches. One of them leaned towards the aforementioned damsel in distress.

"Shit, yo, that's one hot piece of ass," he slurred. "White as a slab of crack, and I want some, baby!"

"Ain't she that cop's daughter?" a tall boy with sharp, narrow eyes asked. "That cop that done shot my cousin?"

"She dead, man," a fat boy said. "Tyreece's brother killed that bitch. Blam! Blam! She just dropped! Yo, that was a _hot_ shot! She had a bulletproof vest 'n' all that cop shit!"

"She—Did—Not."

It was the first time the girl spoke. Her handbag trembled, her long red hair shook.

"What the fuck?" a boy exclaimed. The thugs took a step back.

"She didn't put on her bulletproof vest," the girl said again. "Get the hell out of my way, you lowlife, and you _worms_."

Her eyes bore down on the gang, angrily daring them to challenge her. The staring contest continued for a few minutes, and then the boys realized that the girl had nothing but a small handbag for self-defense. Leers and switchblades popped out of fists, and somewhere, a pistol was cocked.

"Wha'cha gonna do, girl? Gonna come at us with that handbag? Gonna get _shot_ like mommy?"

"Neither," she said. Her eyes flicked upwards, to the squat buildings around her. "You're going to regret this, you idiots."

Somewhere up there, red eyes glowed.

XXXXX

It is said that testicles and the sizes of these organs indicate strength and manliness. The author hereby intends to disagree, for testicles are fairly weak things with a bad tendency to bring their owner otherworldly pain when attacked, whereas the vagina is clearly far more durable, flexible and tactically superior, being in a less intrusive spot within the body. With this in mind, it is not surprising that a pigtailed girl was standing over a pile of young men, all of whom were lying on the ground, shattered beyond repair. Their clothes smoldered.

"Asuka-chan," she sang. "Don't go to bad places without telling me, 'kay?"

"Hi…Hikari," Asuka Soryu said in a shaken voice. "Oh…thank you, I guess."

Hikari yelped suddenly. Clouds drifted apart, revealing a bright full moon.

"Oh…you're giving up who you are already, Asuka-chan?" she asked in the same sing-song voice. "Poor girl…haven't you forgotten who we are?"

Her fist slammed into her palm. Dropping her handbag, Asuka did likewise.

"Don't forget!" Hikari Hokari snarled. Bouncing on top of the pile of thugs, she took off into the air with a flourish and a spin. Asuka glanced up, a little spooked by her speed. She looked around, but nobody was there.

"Where are you looking? I'm up here, right up here!"

Asuka's smile widened.

"Hikari!"

The girl's eyes widened with a ferocious growl.

"Answer me, Asuka!" she roared, leaping off the building she was perched on and throwing off the coat she had on.

"The school of the Undefeated of the East!"

Asuka threw back her fists and slammed her hands together.

"The winds of the kings!"

Their fists clashed at a breathtaking speed, exchanging blows without pause.

"Zenshin!"

"Keiretsu!"

"Tempa Kyuoran!"

The earth rumbled as the two fists crashed together, and a wave of flame washed through the dank alleyway.

"LOOK! DETROIT IS BURNING RED!"

XXXXX

The smell of fish covered the little shop, making it unbearable to the olfactory organs. Shinji rubbed his sore arms, the final crate of tuna having been loaded into the refrigerator, and sat on an empty box. Tomorrow, he and Rei would begin going to the local public school. Gendo had made arrangements with astonishing speed and efficiency. Loans had come from unknown sources for him to set up shop and open up in less than a week. Somebody had been clearing the paperwork and obstacles at an ungodly speed. Although thankful, Shinji was not altogether too sure of the legitimacy of the unknown beneficiary.

That was what he was thinking half an hour or so ago. Now, his head was pounding, and something was holding him against a bed frame. He blanched when he noticed that he was stark naked, and his privates were covered with some sort of wire.

"I see you are awake," someone said. Shinji strained to see, but the restraints held him back.

"It's me, Rei," the voice said. Shinji gagged.

"Rei—_Rei_, what the hell are you doing?"

She was dressed in a tight leather bikini, the bra making her small breasts look bigger. The bottom was incredibly tight and useless to hide a maiden's modesty. She carried a switch.

"I have found what is commonly known as 'the stash,'" she informed him. "As your sister, I am obligated to keep you on the correct path."

She swirled the whip, and slashed it across his genitals.

"This is…"

He screamed again as she brought the whip around the other way

"Onee-chan's punishment!"

XXXXX

The moon shone down on Asuka's hair, giving it a ghostly look. Silently, she and Hikari walked down the street. Passing vagabonds paid them no heed as the two girls looked on ahead.

"Asuka," Hikari began. "Aren't you going to get over…move on?"

The redhead's jaw clenched, loosened, and she shook her head.

"Not yet," she muttered.

"Is that why you didn't use what you know to defend yourself?" Hikari asked. "You could have been hurt pretty badly—"

"I promised myself that I wouldn't touch it again," Asuka cut her friend off. "What we did…in the alley…it was for friendship's sake. I mean, it's not like I did it just for you or anything…it's for…um, old time's sake."

Hikari grabbed Asuka's hand. A few drunks across the street hooted and whistled.

"But you worked so hard, and you were so good at it. Why would you give it all up?" she demanded. "Come on, you're living alone, you don't have a friend…aren't you lonely?"

"I don't need a friend!" she snapped, jerking her hand away. "I can live just _fine_ by myself!"

"Asuka-chan…" Hikari said blankly. Her eyes moistened. "What…happened yo you?"

"You know what happened," Asuka said coldly. "You know _exactly_ what happened."

Hikari nodded sadly.

"I guess the wounds are still fresh," she said. "All the same, you really shouldn't let it hit you so hard. You're still Asuka Langley Soryu; you're still the kind, gentle, happy girl I know."

She cupped Asuka's cheeks in her hands.

"Don't make that girl go away, 'kay?"

Asuka pushed Hikari away, still averting her eyes.

"It's too late," she said. "You should stop trying, Hikari-chan. You won't make her come back."

"So I should stop trying?" Hikari demanded. "Asuka, I can save you from an army of thugs, a mob of any size, even the military, if I had to, but I can't save you from yourself."

She grimaced.

"I suppose," she said. "I'll have to try…"

Asuka's eyes widened in fear

"No, no you don't—"

"ULTIMATE SECRET TECHNIQUE: BRIGHT SLAP!"

Trash cans flew as Asuka was smashed back several dozen yards, trailing smoke and arcs of light. A dilapidated building shuddered with the force of the girl's body striking a wall. A ring of dust lifted spider webs, spiders and their dinner up into the air, hurling the surprised arachnids into oblivion. The wall was dented, and dust filled the air. Overhead, the moon's light was darkened by the might of the hit.

Groaning, Asuka struggled to her feet.

"Don't give me a lecture, too," she said. "That technique in itself is bad enough."

"You were never able to master it," Hikari said sternly. "Because your heart wasn't ready. It could not handle the mental stress involved in the heart of the move. You have yet to grow up."

Asuka laughed bitterly.

"Right. Of course; you're so much better than I am, aren't you, Hikari-sama? You're strong enough, you're mature enough, and you can—"

"SECOND ROUND: BRIGHT BACKHAND!"

The street was cut open, concrete spilling out like guts. Asuka lay buried in a wall on the other side. The moon went dark. When it came back, Hikari was sitting on the stomped curb, cuddling Asuka in her arms.

"You don't get it," she said. "I do this because…"

Asuka's trembling hand crept up Hikari's shirt, and then, slowly, softly, caressed her cheek.

"It's because I love you!"

A moment passed

Then, another

And another

A disheveled hippie, impoverished by a liberal-arts education that gave him no job, who was lying in a cardboard box, poked his head out to see what was causing this ruckus. Not seeing any evil corporations, wars and government conspiracies to protest, he went back to sleep.

Hikari's body shielded a stunned Asuka from the chilly night wind as silent tears fell upon the girl's cheek.

"Why are you crying?" she asked in an emotionless tone. "Are you…stupid? What's there to…cry about?"

"Back there, back in the alleyway, you weren't just going through the motions," Hikari stated. "I felt your passion, your desire, your strength. That was not something for the sake of old times, and I know it."

She held out her hand.

"You haven't forgotten what it's like to dream yet, Asuka. Don't fall away. Come back to me…come back to us…okay?"

**End Stage XIV**


	5. First Taste's On the House

**Nerv: Dry Cleaning and Takeout**

**Stage V: First Taste's On the House**

Pre-knowledge of: Rudimentary Spanish is requisite for reading this chapter

Rei was raised by a good woman, and as a rather schoolmarm-ish—well, she thought she was schoolmarm-ish—and proper young lady herself, she must keep everything neat and organized. It was with this mindset that she set about cleaning up the impromptu BDSM chamber she had erected in the spacious basement of the shop. Shinji lay flat on the rack she had tied him to, limp and spent from having his thoughts corrected for a good hour and a half. The leather whip was meticulously rolled into a tight bun and stowed in its casing, after having been oiled to ensure that the leather did not crack. As a final test for her brother, Rei undid her suit casually, letting it fall onto the ground. She wore nothing underneath, as this was how the particular article of clothing was designed as a sexually arousing piece of underwear and thus should not be further padded. She padded over to Shinji and bent to pick up a random segment of rope that had fallen. His head followed her, but no more reactions came. Item one, check; she clapped her hands.

"You will now be aroused," she informed him. He responded most satisfactorily; item two, check.

Now for the most difficult part

"End your arousal"

His body complied, though it was doubtful that the reactions were conscious actions on his part. However, this concluded Rei's training. She sealed the paper away and stamped it.

XXXXX

Normally, Asuka headed straight home, unless she was inclined to stay and watch the school's football team do something violent. Today, though, Hikari was waiting outside, ready to get Asuka to go have a little fun the moment she came out of the building. Not knowing much of the demographics of local eateries, Asuka opted for the one she thought would be the cheapest, a freshly opened take-out sushi shop two blocks from school grounds. Apart from a surprisingly smooth and charming young man and his sister transferring in from Japan—of all places!—nothing interesting had occurred. It was with this sense of boredom that she led Hikari in a silent march to the shop.

"Ay, don' wait for me today, _mamí_!" a voice yelled from across the street, where he was sitting with a group of men. "I'm gonna hang with the _barrio_ t'night, _comprendes_?"

"_Sí_, Kaji-san; make your own dinner, then!" Asuka shot back.

"Who was _that_?" Hikari asked, unable to comprehend why Asuka was living with a near-two-meter Asian-Hispanic hulk of a man almost twice her age.

"Ryoji Jose-Rodriguez Kaji, the guy I was sent to after…well, he's my uncle," Asuka answered.

Out of politeness, Hikari declined to point out the fact that Asuka was a Eurasian girl of petit build, with creamy white skin and long, straight, red hair, while the supposed uncle was massive, dark-skinned Hispanic man, but Asuka answered her anyways.

"Different fathers," she said. "All sorts of mixtures in this place; don't be surprised. Besides, I learn Spanish for free."

She sounded oddly hollow about the subject. Hikari winced to think of how many memories of her mother Asuka has to remember by just thinking about this man, whose roof she lived under. Asuka pushed open the door to the shop, and stared in surprise. The shop was packed with laughing people, and the young man from before was shuttling trays of sushi back and forth from the kitchen to the dingy eating room.

"Didn't they just open?" Hikari asked.

"Well, how am I supposed to know that they could do so well?" Asuka snapped, back to her usual self. The young man, whose name Asuka remembered to be Shinji Ikari, waltzed up to them with his tray.

"Good afternoon," he said with a little bow. "Can I help you with anything?"

"Yes," Asuka said. "You can find us somewhere to sit."

He swept his arm in the direction of the back of the shop.

"There are more spaces out in the back," he said. "Please feel free to call me whenever you feel like taking an order."

"Cute," Hikari commented when the boy was out of sight. "It's a nice place."

"Let's go, Hikari," Asuka said, dragging the other girl through the throngs of customers. They found an empty spot, and prepared to sit down, when Asuka bumped against someone.

"Ah, good afternoon, Asuka," Kaworu said. "What a pleasant surprise."

When she glared at him, his hand shot up to his chin, where there were still residues of white stuck to his face. Feigning a cough, he wiped his mouth clean.

"Well, what are you still standing here for?" she demanded. Hikari pulled on Asuka's shirt.

"Asuka!" she admonished. Then, in a louder voice, "Hey, why don't you sit down with us?"

"My pleasure," he answered. Asuka turned her nose. The young man came back with dishes, which he set in front of them, and each received a small piece of sushi.

"First taste is on the house," he said. "You'll be coming back for more, soon enough!"

As he left, Kaworu chuckled.

"The boys say the same when they sell, well…" he looked at Hikari. "Their own wares"

Asuka snorted, angrily looking away from the boy. She picked up the sushi, and bit into it. Her countenance instantly changed. Electricity seemed to rush through her body. Her eyes glistened with the sensation.

"It's…magical…" she whispered. "What is this, I don't even…"

The air billowed as Hikari registered the taste of the sushi. Her senses screamed. Kaworu merely remarked, "Better than cocaine, definitely."

The sound of a poorly tuned guitar bounced into the dining room. Asuka's eyes widened. A man with an extraordinary beard stood on the counter, crappy, peeling guitar in hand.

"Wercome!" he yelled in heavily accented English. "To restaurant's opening day, yes?"

"What is he saying?" Hikari demanded.

"I believe he is speaking in a language known as Engrish," Kaworu informed her. "Decipher it as English."

"I see," she said. The man played another jarring note.

"I came to America, see? 'Cause I wanted opporturity, for my famirry," he sang. "There many opporturity here in America, so I make raundry shop and restaurant! Thank you for coming today, I has a speciar for you arr today!"

He whipped a platter out from behind him without disturbing the pile of sushi on top in any way.

"First taste's on the house, as arways!" he proclaimed. The young man began dishing out the sushi, which themselves looked rather like cocaine packaged in dark wrapping paper, in Kaworu's eyes.

Proudly, Gendo surveyed the room as the customers partook of his sushi, the potent new recipe that he had gone through fire and brimstone for, that he had spent the better part of his life perfecting. It was magical. He knew it would be.

Gasps sounded all over the tables. Gendo's hair veritably stood on its end as a shockwave of pure _delicious_ set the room's senses ablaze. He could almost feel it; their brand new sensation, their need, their desire for more, no matter what, and their addiction. There's no way they wouldn't be coming back for more after this.

As Kaworu said, better than cocaine.

**End Stage V**


End file.
